MAGICAL PERSONALS: bond-single abomination witch teen seeks premise-mandated mutual torture

[discarding]

Name: Midousuji Akira
Date: 5/3
Format: text; UN: akira

---

Hello.

I know the network is overused for this purpose, but all the same: I need a Bond. So the hope is that one of you Monster Mirrorbound are in a similar situation.

[Midousuji squints, rolling his eyes up as he tilts his head back, scowling as he growls out a long grosssss. this feels pathetic. and creepy, and weird. like writing a goddamn personal ad.

well, it kind of is. Midousuji refrains from the temptation of commenting on as much; normally, he's on the network as HOTARU☆KUN—uninhibited for the most part, and largely unlikable. but he's asking for a favor, so better to just switch modes. just be purely objective, don't display any reactionary tendencies, don't make sport of bullying.]

I'm a learning Witch, and I'm still kind of a new arrival. I don't have magic illness, [...anymore, thanks to that weird hiccup where Midousuji got physically accosted by a Puca that he mutually did not consent to bonding with, thanks to shenanigans] but obviously, it's pertinent that I resolve this.

So: I'm a quiet, private person. I do not like other people, and I do not like to be touched. I understand physical touch helps facilitate the symbiotic siphoning of magic or whatever, and it's not as if it's impossible to compromise for the sake of practicality, but I'm not going to do any cuddling or whatever.

Ideally, I'd like to form a Bond with a Monster who likewise keeps to themselves. I know the Bonds sometimes have ripples of emotional feedback, and I'm familiar with that feeling. But I'd like the kind of person who if they were to get a sense of something like that, they'd mind their own business. I'd do the same, of course, but it would be easier to tolerate someone who isn't strongly emotional in the first place. Outside of that, I don't care what kind of person I form a Bond with.

I know that beggars can't be choosers, blah blah, so save your smart-alecky responses for some other victim. I'll settle if I have to, but I may as well ask for the best fit first.

[he almost made it a whole post without having an attitude. alas]

Comments

TEXT | un: flowergirl

[bloomly]

( okay, hopefully he's the only akira here, which she doubts, but this sounds like it fits, so she may just risk making a fool of herself-- )

No cuddling, really? That's disappointing...

I hope you find something that fits you... This all sounds really reasonable! If you can't, then we'll start thinking about other options.

( again with this we... )

Oh, this is Aerith-chan, by the way! I hope you're feeling better. If this is you. If it isn't, I'm sorry, stranger!

text | PRIVATE

[discarding]

[Midousuji leans his head far back, eyes wide with a taut, baffled frown. who the hell was this pervert remiss about cuddling?? he squints at the username. a lady pervert? OR, just a jerk. probably just sarcasm, given how cold the post read? comically non-intimate.

he tilts his head, squinting with a more exaggerated scowl.

then he gets another message, and leans forward, the top of his palm resting against the back of his neck. wait, WE?? who the—

Midousuji's eyes widen when he reads her name. using a self directed honorific. an honorific he taught her. god. this is his fault. Midousuji's expression is severe from where he sits, knees hiked high, feet crossed, jaw set tense.

god he is so glad he figured out how to send things under a private mask on these stupid devices]

AAEEEERIITTTHHHH CHANNNNNNNNN

YOU SCARED THE HELL OUT OF MEEEEEE why do you always DO THAT

you shouldn't just run around saying stuff like that ESPECIALLY on the WEIRDO MAGICAL INTERNET to, PERHAPS, STRANGERS!!! saying stuff like that on a public network with your NAME SIGNED????

YOU

LUNATIC!!! GROSS

text | eternally private from here

[bloomly]

How is a message scary?!

Stop calling me gross...! I told you!!!

( okay, except she's laughing. she really shouldn't be. but she's laughing. she's never been called a lunatic before, it's sort of special. )

Besides, what's the problem?
Is there something wrong with my name~?

It's better to be upfront about these things, in case I owe someone a proper apology!

Wait, so is Akira your first name? Akira-kun? Akira-kun and Aerith-chan?

and so too eternally text

[discarding]

what do you MEAN what is the PROBLEM, i JUST explained it!!!!

[Midousuji literally bites his tongue, eyes widening with frustration. what is this???? her humor??? pretty unforgivable. some people are like that, of course—but this... Midousuji's eyes narrow suspiciously.

okay. he's onto her. he knows what this is!

but before he can get to his accusations, he's so startled by her next message, comparing their first names, that he shrieks and drops the watch—and given his shoddy motor skills and reaction time, he fails to catch it, his grasp just late enough to kind of bat it back in the air before it falls.

once he manages to get it back into his (too hard) grasp, Midousuji frankly looks...livid. he isn't, though. panicked might be more accurate? he has no idea what he's experiencing]

AKIRA is my given name. ONLY people in my family call me Akira.

Where I'm from, the family name is customary instead of the given, unless the two people are really close............ like family etc

Otherwise, it's too much. and gross. Of course, I'm not stupid, this isn't my home country, so I don't really expect anything from people. but, I'm not really that kind of person..... I'd prefer if people misunderstood "Akira" as my last name

[bloomly]

Oh! Okay. So if that's true, then shouldn't you be calling me Gainsborough-chan?

You acted all familiar right from the get-go, wow~

( okay, now she's teasing him, sorry... )

But Midousuji-kun it is.

I actually might know someone who fits your specifications, so I'll let you know if it pans out, okay? And I'll introduce myself properly so I won't be all...gross, when I message you.

[discarding]

THAT ISN'T TRUE!!

[Midousuji, there's these things called jokes. but when he's half way through typing his defense, he seems to realize it. he blinks, then leans back. jesus

he blinks, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes when she says she won't be gross. that doesn't seem possible.]

jeez you seem too concerned about my opinion, be however. I just get to react accordingly. not being the way you aCTUALLY are because youre worried about someone you barely know thinking youre gross is even MORE gross.

Anyway who is this person???

[bloomly]

Well, I don't really want to be called gross for like, the eighteenth time~! But I guess I'm doomed to be gross? Aerith Grossborough~

He's just someone that I know. He's very quiet, keeps to himself, knows how to put distance between things. I don't know if he'll go for it, but I asked just to see.

Does that fit your specifications?

[discarding]

[Midousuji's eyes widen, and he throws his head back with a roll of his eyes, pressing a laugh against the curled fingers of his hand, stifling it childishly.

okay...... that was pretty good.

Midousuji goes back to attention, recovering from his giggles enough to reply. he likes immature, mean name puns, so...]

WOW.... I can't believe I laughed

but yea pretty much everyone's gross, people are gross, EVEN GIRLS, etc, it's a useless thing to worry about.

Ooh, yeah, he sure would. Let me know~~ You know, you're so helpful, it almost makes up for everything else!

[Midousuji does appreciate that she's been stubbornly helpful for reasons he can't discern (which makes him a little suspicious even now), but he's...not good at expressing that kind of thing. clearly. but that's okay. if it turns out this is a connection worth maintaining, Midousuji will find some other way to express it. maybe]

[bloomly]

What exactly is everything else...!

Anyway, I'm asking him about it still, so you better be nice to me or I'll have to take it back~ Grossborough-chan doesn't play around, okay.

( she really isn't bothered by it--and hey, he laughed, so it's worth it anyway. )

In the meantime, take care of yourself, make sure you don't have any more problems...

[discarding]

Everything encompassed by "being a handful", loollll

Sheesh! Grrrross. Well, that's business, I guess~ and who knows. Maybe I won't be needing him.

[though Midousuji sounds.....meaner... he's truthfully having a bit of fun, eyes narrow and grinning in a way that looks more sinisterly than it really is. it's a good sign. maybe. though he still has some distrustful suspicions about Aerith, but hey, at least she's interesting.

not great for his blood pressure so far, though. but he's determined to come around on the other side of that—no way is she gonna get to keep the power in this dynamic!! so he thinks. stupid]

Yeah, yeah, don't worry about it.

[as if he didn't........get in this situation because of not taking care of himself.]

Take care of YOURSELF, Aerith-chan. After all, you're ssssooo recklesssss lolol

text; un: scenarios

[silentsavant]

There is nothing wrong with using the network for this purpose. It's actually how I found a suitable partner when I was in need of the same thing.

[And the one single time he made a post on it in the span of two whole years!]

I am not currently in dire need of a Witch. That said, I like to keep my prospects open should something happen. I view Bonds from the lens of a mutually beneficial contract. You seem to hate people about as much as I do, and I would happily mind my own business if you are intent to do the same.

[Charming...]

My name is Soren. I am a Dragon who has been here for two years now. Though I cannot practice magic like I used to, I have studied it in my spare time. My main interest lies in finding a way to return to my old life. However, I have no actionable leads on that front, so my intent for now is simply to survive until I do. That means it is also in my best interest to learn as much about how to combat the Cwyld as I can.

Tell me a little more about yourself. Your name, your goals. Things of that nature.

text | PRIVATE [cuz midousuji's not trying to air all this personal info in public jeez guys]

[discarding]

[oh. another people-hating dragon-person. that went real well last time. but #notalldragons, Midousuji gets it. still, he squints, tilting his head to rest his cheek against his knee, tongue unfurling in an absent-minded dangle.

Midousuji distantly wonders if he truly hates people. he feels like that gives them too much power over his feelings, but that sounds like a pretty spiteful perspective. still, he doesn't like them, and prefers to be left alone—but is otherwise indifferent, he thinks, with a bitter, skittish and resentful undertone...]

My name is "Midousuji," though I prefer that on the public networks, people just address me by my usernames. Keep things tidy n' separate.

My goal is AAAALSO to find a way to return to my old life, because my purpose is inaccessible here. I'm thinking there has to be some unturned stone when it comes to getting home, which I'm pretty sure has something to do with magic (while I'm aware I'm not the first person to have had such an idea, blah blah)... So in the mean time, though I'm not happy about it, I'm just practicing getting more used to magic, and I'd like to achieve fluency with it. It seems like most Witches already have a history with magic, prior to arriving here... Makes me wonder if there's a larger percentage of worlds that has magic versus ones that don't. I'm just a pretty "normal" human with regards to all THAT stuff.

As for the Cwyld, I don't care much about that aside from staying the heck away from it.

So anyway! That's that! I can't really think of anything else that's pertinent to share.

[not getting personal on a personals ad!]

[silentsavant]

I have met a number of people who come from worlds with no magic. It is difficult for me to imagine such a possibility, but after the things I have seen and heard of other realities, I'm better off keeping an open mind. You, having had no prior experience in magic, are actually in a better position to learn it than someone used to their own ways. I know for a fact: I would have to "unlearn" some habits that are ingrained in me. You don't have to untangle yourself like that, so you have a headstart compared to prior magic practitioners.

Barring any personal setbacks, such as stupidity.

I have another term you must abide by if this is going to work. Naturally, it goes both ways. Should we ultimately come to an agreement on a Bond, I must be free to annul it without much notice. I always seek out my best interests. You would be my weakest link.

[discarding]

Innnteresting, I've heard that's a challenge...I don't know if I'd say it's an advantage per SE, but probably it varies person to person.

Thankfully, of my personal setbacks, stupidity isn't among them.

[well, stupidity is subjective. he's plenty stupid in every regard outside of academics and strategizing, though some of that probably comes from his...weird brain..... magic has been slow to get the hang of, but Midousuji is slow to anything that involves his body being a conduit for any purpose.]

Uh huh, yep, sure. That's reasonable. I know I have less leverage in this exchange. SOME notice would be appreciated so I can do this dumb thing again without incurring magic sickness, etc. Since you already have a Witch bond, I assume notice on my part is less pertinent, buuuut I'll still let you know in advance if I decide it's no longer something I want to be involved in. Polite business practice.

Unless, you know, it's for my own safety and you're crazy or whatever. Like one of those dragon people who has the instinct to eat humans and I end up looking like food.

[silentsavant]

Good. I don't tolerate it well.

Some notice, certainly. I would notify you in advance and we would make the necessary arrangements. After that, I could help you find a new Bond if you are in desperate need of a replacement. Nobody likes an exploding Witch liability, myself included. We Mirrorbound have incurred a bad enough reputation in some circles as it is.

...Look. I may not be fond of people, but that doesn't make me a savage. Anyway, let's not get ahead of ourselves. I am extending only tentative interest. If we are to consider ourselves a prospective match, our next step would be to meet in person. I can only garner so much of who you are through text, after all.

[And some of his typing quirks are a little annoying. But he's worked with personalities that were more than 'a little annoying' in the past.]

I will be free tomorrow afternoon. We can meet at the Coven. After that, we can test a temporary Bond together and have you practice using spells. What time and where is most convenient for you?

[discarding]

[it's true, his typing has suddenly gotten a little more annoying. but it's a bit more honest, anyway! not that Midousuji is planning on being gregarious in Soren's company, but...

Midousuji tilts his head, then rolls his eyes curiously. meeting in person being the make or break. Midousuji knows how people tend to react to his physical presence...

well. he'll have other leads, worse coming to worst.]

Hoooh, do we? That would make sense. I've only heard things like some passive aggressive whispering about people's bare legs or manner of speaking, but it's hard to imagine the people native to this world wouldn't have various misgivings about us.

[ugh, SPELLS? why spells. probably to test Midousuji's adjusted levels of magic, or whatever... the balance... whyy]

Late morning is best for me. Let's just meet at the Coven's library.

I'll be easy to spot. 6'0", thin, big eyes, big shoulders, shaved head, face mask.

[silentsavant]

Oh, trust me. It's much more scandalous than flashing a bit of skin. Even without spiraling into detailed explanations, the lone fact that we are foreign interlopers with strange qualities that set us apart from the natives should be enough for the more prejudiced members of a populace to turn their noses up at us. Humans will always be humans, and Monsters are really no different in that regard, either.

[Yes, SPELLS! You want to excel at being a Witch, don't you?]

That works out perfectly for me. Though we are exceedingly rare, I am not the only Dragon to be seen around the Coven, so it might help to know that my scales are black, red, and beige, like my hair, eyes, and skin. I am very small for my species and have a distinctive mark on my forehead. With this information alone, you cannot be mistaken.

I will aim to meet you by the circulation desk. See you tomorrow.

[discarding]

Haaaa. Guess it's a "people" problem and less of a "human" problem! Gross, typical, gross. Seems some constants truly are universal!

Okay, great. Around 10am, then. Bye bye for now.

text; un: ziedrich

[grandspark]

A friend suggested I look here.

[He'll refrain from further indicating Aerith but he figures the other person could probably take the hint considering she responded here. Doesn't know where the rest of the conversation went though...interesting.]

I'm a Monster without a permanent Bond to a Witch. Seems it's suggested that not be the case. I don't care but it could make things easier in the long run.

I have no qualms keeping to myself.

[He's still not sure about this but there. He did what he said he would do, for Aerith.]

text forever

[discarding]

Ooooh.

Yes, it unfortunately does appear to be that way. Better with than without.

Well, tell me about yourself, then. Let's start with your name. She didn't mention it either. The mystery's been laid on pretty thick~