text -- anonymous

[turmoiling]

Name: anonymous
Date: 5/16
Format: text

Has anyone discovered a way to control what or how much is felt through a Bond? Sharing feelings between the two of us is usually not a problem. But there are some things that my Bonded is much more sensitive to than myself, and I don't wish to put them through a difficult time again.

Comments

text; un: sylphid

[sylphid]

what, like it's hard?

[fiddlestick]

[He sighs at fie's response, not that he can hear it.]

Yeah, you can control how much your Bonded. It just takes some practice to get used to.

[turmoiling]

Perhaps with practice it's easier. I would hope for a solution in the interim.

[turmoiling]

Let's assume for the sake of argument that degree of control isn't possible on a personal level.

[fiddlestick]

Isn't possible...?

Then I don't know. I haven't heard of anything other than that, sorry.

[sylphid]

quick fixes are rarely worth it if it's that important.

[turmoiling]

There are some things where our feelings differ greatly. I fear I am understating the problem somewhat when I write that, but it's difficult to explain further. Surely this can't be the first case of such complications

[fiddlestick]

Sorry, I don't know every special case of Bonding. I just know that learning how to self-manage what you show is how my Bonded and I do it with emotions we rather not share.

Maybe someone else will have a better answer.

[turmoiling]

I would hardly ask for advice in such a manner except as a final resort.

[sylphid]

well you got some. seems like you're writing it off before you even try it though. not sure why if this is that important. there really aren't many options.

audio; un: reddeer

[rightfoot]

It's not that hard if you're willing to put even the smallest bit of effort in.

[turmoiling]

One can try, but sometimes there are external forces at play.

The Bonding ceremony is performed by Witches; I would have thought that they would have potions or spells to help with alleviating these sorts of issues.

[turmoiling]

Could you describe what you mean by self-manage? I don't wish for there to be a miscommunication.

[turmoiling]

Unfortunately, that is incorrect in this case.

[rightfoot]

Why so? Neither of you are able or willing to put in effort?

[sylphid]

it's literally managing your own feelings. internally. unless someone is constantly beating you with a stick or something there is not an external force that should prevent you from just trying.

sounds to me like you're just looking for an easy way out. attempts at vague reasoning just make it harder for people to try and offer real solutions.

[turmoiling]

Even a considerable effort is not entirely sufficient. And there are external factors to deal with as well, which neither of us has complete control over.

[fiddlestick]

Um...it's controlling your own feelings?

Like if you have a thought that's not appropriate, you stop yourself from saying it out loud right?

It's the same kind of principal. You try to restrain your thoughts or feelings from projecting onto your bond. Like I tend to visual a mental wall between myself and my bond.

[rightfoot]

Why is it not sufficient? Obviously you can't control the world around you, but you can control how you react to things around you.

[turmoiling]

I think you should be able to understand that I can only say so much like this.

In lieu of a real example, let us suppose there is a man with a stick, who no-one else can see or deal with. What then?

[turmoiling]

That's what I was afraid of. There there is often not enough time for that amount of careful thought under certain circumstances.

[turmoiling]

On some things, the difference between the strength of our feelings is too great. I would consider my reaction controlled, as much as is possible under the circumstances. But they do not.

Please understand that even that much is an understatement of the scenario.

un: connor

[plasticasshole]

It takes some concentration at first, but you can control it. It gets easier with time. Something that helped me was to imagine a wall between me and my Bonded. Visualising the blocking process at first helped me to eventually do it without the wall, whenever I needed to.

[rightfoot]

So it's not a you problem, it's a them problem.

[fiddlestick]

[...]

Um...

Just what kind of circumstances are you talking about?