M (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
onamissile) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
aefenglom2021-03-01 05:07 pm
onamissile) wrote in aefenglom2021-03-01 05:07 pm
Entry tags:
Voice; UN: Deneuve
Name: M; UN: Deneuve
Date: 3/1/21
Format: [Voice]
[There's a short blip of silence; Mello knows that even his voice can be identified if needed and traced. But he remembers the pain in his chest. The swirling of the delivery truck's mirror, and everything after that, well — ]
[A sharp clearing of his throat. It's so dry.]
I know what I've been told.
[Everything is bullshit until proven otherwise.]
And I know what I'm expected to believe.
[Definitely lies. And for one: he knows he's died. It doesn't take a previous heart attack in his situation to recognize one when it tears at your chest and throat and breath like a visceral assault. Besides, he was always due for one: wasn't he?]
I don't expect honesty from anyone. [And yet here he is: reaching out. Because what else can he do?] But a Witch?
[Or so he's been told. How appropriate. Another pause; another breath.]
Is this Hell?
[He's seen nothing that leads him to believe otherwise. The mirror with the objects and reflections from home. The things that just don't make sense. Maybe someone will honestly reveal that yes, he's earned this. Maybe not.]
Date: 3/1/21
Format: [Voice]
[There's a short blip of silence; Mello knows that even his voice can be identified if needed and traced. But he remembers the pain in his chest. The swirling of the delivery truck's mirror, and everything after that, well — ]
[A sharp clearing of his throat. It's so dry.]
I know what I've been told.
[Everything is bullshit until proven otherwise.]
And I know what I'm expected to believe.
[Definitely lies. And for one: he knows he's died. It doesn't take a previous heart attack in his situation to recognize one when it tears at your chest and throat and breath like a visceral assault. Besides, he was always due for one: wasn't he?]
I don't expect honesty from anyone. [And yet here he is: reaching out. Because what else can he do?] But a Witch?
[Or so he's been told. How appropriate. Another pause; another breath.]
Is this Hell?
[He's seen nothing that leads him to believe otherwise. The mirror with the objects and reflections from home. The things that just don't make sense. Maybe someone will honestly reveal that yes, he's earned this. Maybe not.]
audio; video: [Private]
[Partial lie; partial truth. If this is Near, Mello already knows who he is, as he knows Mello. What are names to those who have no intention of using them for power? And oh, if only he could see Mello's expression upon his telling: it's a beautiful story, really.]
[The flailing. That's something Mello wished he could have seen the most. The desperation. The loss. He would have paid to see Kira on his knees. Sobbing. (He hopes.) Begging for the dead.]
[He's silent while the tale is told. Silent enough for anyone to suspect he's disconnected; but then — ]
[He fiddles with the device. Switches to video. What can it hurt, anyway? He's already died. Painfully. The video shows a close-up of his face — scars and all — for he's been leaning in, listening with rapt attention. His eyes are wide with near-excitement and satisfaction. So his death wasn't for nothing. He'd killed Yagami without even being present. Quite the accomplishment, if true.]
N.
[Whether or not Mello truly believes the weight behind that single letter remains to be seen. For both of them.]
Why do you look so fucking old?
[Old, as in older than Mello remembers. He's studying the other's face, the slight differences. The length of his hair, the same, placid look in those eyes that he remembers.]
audio; video: [Private]
Not everyone could forge through losses the way Mello did, and this is why the blond is better than others.
The naga holds up one hand, briefly glancing over the back of it.]
I'm sure the scales don't help.
[The hand is lowered. Near has never been vain, so the insults about his appearance are taken as part of the other man's greeting.]
This place exists outside our time and isn't limited by it. For me, a decade has passed since your death - and as far as I know I'm still alive. I don't recall dying.
video: [Private]
[Not that it matters. Nothing matters, as of yet. Besides, Mello's never given a shit about Near, anyway. Not really. Just a rival. Just — ]
And you're not human.
[Never was, M would argue. But that's hyperbole, and he knows it. He stares, because that's what he does, and the sharp, long intake of breath is as audible as it is visible.]
So you lived, then.
[Maybe just a bit of jealousy peeks through in his tone. Mello had never wanted to die; it was just a thing that needed to happen. Again, for the Greater Good, which is why he's swaying on his opinion that this is, in fact, Hell. Seeing Near this way is off-putting, though. If nothing else.]
You would.
[Low. Defeated. But a compliment, if Mello has ever given one.]
I don't know what to believe, [he admits, and it isn't weakness. Not really.]
They tell me I'm a Witch, but I don't feel like one.
[Except for the excessive warmth in his wrists, his veins. Fire, something tells him. But he's ignoring that, for now.] What — are you?
[Besides a little shit. The blonde holds on to preconceptions more strongly than others.]
no subject
[Near tilts the angle of the camera finally, allowing Mello to see that past the long shirt he's wearing there's nothing but scaled body. His tail forms a figure eight on the floor, and he brings the tip of it back around into view.]
A snake creature. Not by choice, of course. I wouldn't have chosen this.
[He'd gratefully trade with any of his witch bonded given the opportunity. Or anyone in general, really.]
I didn't feel like a monster either, at first. It will develop. The only real benefit this has given me is the ability to easily bond with witches - of which our mentor and his rival both are.
[The unspoken here being that he's bonded with both of them.]
Meanwhile you should call me Eli. Eli Dagwood is my name here. You'll want a different alias too.
no subject
[The following revelation has M holding his breath. L, he understands (If that really is L; Mello still has his suspicions.) But Kira. Fucking Kira? The only thing N has going for him in that department is that Mello trusts him enough that he suspects an ulterior motive. Know thy enemy. Keep them closer. He responds to neither claim; why should he? Near knows him enough (he thinks) to know his possible opinion on the matter.]
[Change the subject while keeping in line with the conversation, then.]
I'm not stupid, idiot.
[Will they always be children with each other.]
I've already spoken with Kira. A girl — she claims to know me — has already outed me as "M."
I told Yagami my name is Malakai Antonov. I don't know if he believes it, but I'll go by it for now. Covers the "M." I assume you'll hold on to that, as well.
[Really, what is an alias to him? Kira has already done his damage. But he'll use it, because that's what he does.]
Your... form. [Because he's in Inquisitor at heart.] Does it hurt?
no subject
[And the shedding is a bit on the obnoxious side, but he wouldn't consider it a painful experience. It only happens every few months or so, it seems. He's kept all of his sheddings. He wouldn't want them used against him but they could still be useful if a bonded needs one for a spell of some sort. This might be considered mildly creepy to some given that one is his human skin.
He memorizes the name his rival has chosen. Nothing simple, of course. That wouldn't be Mello.]
Alex is the girl's name, I believe, but I know very little about her.
[That had been the other man's private business. Near didn't go digging around when it came to who Mello kept as friends. They weren't against each other here.]
no subject
[So far as he knows. Poses no threat, thus far.]
[And what the hell is Mello supposed to do now? Is being a "Witch" uncomfortable? N wouldn't know, would he? Of course, M is already considering the potential power in having abilities, but at what price? Pain?]
What are you doing about Yagami?
[Almost an accusation. The fact that Kira is conscious enough to even respond to Mello, here, means that Near isn't actively downing him at every turn, doesn't it? Maybe. Maybe Mello's assuming the worst.]
Tell me you're keeping tabs on him, at least.
no subject
[It's a simple answer, and something Mello would have already gathered.]
He doesn't know who I am. As far as he's concerned I'm just the owner of a toy shop who had him temporarily in my employ. Should he get his memories back, breaking the connection between us won't be a simple task.
[Light can't kill him. And even if he did, the naga would come right back. That seems to be the way things work here.]
It was even his idea. I accepted because he is also bonded to our mentor, who I share a bond with as well. [One that had been necessary for his own sanity, something he won't be admitting to Mello right now.] Linden makes questionable decisions when it comes to Yagami. He's drawn to him in a way that's dangerous for him, perhaps even moreso now that he knows he died at his hands.
no subject
[And L — reckless decisions — it would explain the why and how he allowed Kira to defeat him. Even if Near was the one to initially express the sentiment,('Just a loser," to which Mello almost pummeled him in Roger's office) And it's always all been so convoluted, hasn't it?]
Understandable.
[All of it; none of it.]
I'll slit his throat if it makes disconnecting easier.
[A cheshire grin, a bit of sardonic humor in his tone.]
[But Mello trusts N in his reasoning, whatever it might be. Something that he also has no intention of admitting.]
You run a toy shop — [Should M even be surprised?] — and I'm going to need money here, so I've been told. I'll find my own way in time.
[Hasn't he always?]
But I need to triage the immediate situation. I need a job.
[A job. A real one. Disgusting.]
Do you think that you can manage it without it arousing Kira's suspicion?
no subject
He wants to think he can trust his rival not to be a disaster, but then he just thinks that a month might actually be too lenient.]
No.
[When in doubt, blame Light.]
He'll already be wondering why I'm also be bonded with Linden. If I added you into the equation as an employee, even temporarily, it could be a red flag. He knows how picky I am about who I hire.
[And Mello has practically zero of his usual qualifications.]
no subject
You wanted to work with me, once. I was the one who turned you down.
[Remember, remember.]
But I don't care. I don't want to work at a stupid toy shop anyway.
[Dismissive. Childish. There's so many other things Mello can do, anyway.]
So.
[Is private even private? Everything can be hacked.]
What if I were to say I want to see you? I'm not going to shoot you.
no subject
I'm sorry for that. I will gladly work with you on more important matters.
[He twirls a finger in his hair, a familiar gesture that its longer length doesn't seem to hamper.]
I don't mind meeting with you, either. I you don't yet have a place to stay then we can meet at my home. Our privacy shouldn't be interrupted there.
[Unless L decides to barge in for some reason, but there are no secrets given up in that case.]
no subject
[Or has Near truly changed so much? His appearance is different, yeah, but has his rival truly developed... a conscience?]
[There's no way. People are who they are.]
[Important matters, such as making Kira's life here the absolute pit of Hell? Swaying L into trusting that whatever he thinks happened regarding Mello hasn't actually happened? N is bonded with both of them.]
[Where does it begin and end?]
I haven't slept.
[Also known as: he hasn't chosen a place to stay.]
But you're Bonded with both of them.
[Whatever that means. Or doesn't. Mello's tone might be a little bitter. Or maybe he's just overtired. He's always been tired though, hasn't he? No time for sleep when their (former) mission was resting on his shoulders.]
Who's to say that either of them won't show up at your place?
[A shake of a blonde head.]
I don't like it.
no subject
[He nods his head, having taken this into consideration already.]
I understand your concerns. If you have a better location I'm open to suggestions. Otherwise I can recommend a warehouse down at the docks. It won't be as comfortable.
[It's a familiar setting, isn't it? A better place to recount Kira's downfall than over the network, for sure. It also sounds like a place for all kinds of illegal dealings to go down, but in reality it's merely an easy meeting location for some of those who do work for him on commission and don't want him showing up at their house.]
no subject
[Mello will go with a hard "no" on that one. He's quiet for a moment; Near wouldn't lure him into a trap for no reason, even if the fact that he's Bonded to their enemy is enough to raise a brow. Or several. Still, Mello has more faith in N than he does L, so.]
I'd prefer the warehouse.
[Comfort isn't an issue; never has been. Yes, Mello prefers it, but it's not necessary. Besides, he doesn't intend on staying long. Just long enough to gain the information he needs, to see the thing his rival has become.]
I take it you understand why I'm suspicious regarding your situation with Kira.
[It's something Mello intends to inquire about. At length.]
no subject
[The word is in response to both comments, and the naga gives a single nod of his head.]
It would be foolish of you not to be.
[He lifts himself off the floor, the camera following in a dizzying swing upward. If only Mello could appreciate the effort it had taken him to learn how to get around in this form without having to crawl on his belly.]
I will send you the address of the chosen location. We can finish this discussion there.
[action]
[And it is. Whether or not Near has arrived before him is both dire and inconsequential; rivalry will always exist between them even regarding the most minor of things. At least it will with Mello. But Near looked different, older, more experienced with what comes with life and the passing of time. Whether that is a strength or a detriment remains to be seen.]
[The door creaks loudly when Mello turns the unlocked handle and pushes the heavy iron open with his shoulder. He doesn't expect a trap — not really — because N gave him options, and he chose this one. (And maybe Near knew he would, but — ) ]
[The only bad blood they would have between them is the fact that Mello charged one of his lackeys with systematically killing off as much of his rival's team as he could, even going for Near, himself, but. Water under the bridge, he thinks. The blonde died for their cause, after all. Isn't that enough to make amends?]
[He's silent as he enters, despite his obvious arrival. Boot-heels clacking loudly on cement, he makes his way in, glasses shading his eyes despite the lack of need for them. He's got a facade to keep up, and whether or not it matters remains to be seen.]
[He's armed. Of course he is. But Near would know that, he thinks.]
[The point of all of this? To figure out exactly what the hell is going on regarding his rival and L — Yagami shouldn't even be a factor, but he is.]
N.
[He briefly glances around the vast, empty warehouse. Holds his hands out. He's come alone, of course. Why wouldn't he? But still, there will always be suspicion, and proof is required.]
no subject
[Near slides through the doorway after Mello speaks. It helps to have someone else loosen up a door like this first. His arms aren't always up to the task, though they're slightly stronger now than they had been originally, just out of necessity. Crawling is difficult.]
You make good time. [Not that he'd expected anything less.]
[The naga moves with his torso upright, as most non-mirrorbound naga do here and the way most people who'd seen any sort of fantasy series would expect - but only because it's expected. As troublesome as slithering on his belly had been it had still been easier than this. Snakes weren't meant to move with this much of their body perpendicular to the ground.
Foregoing his usual pajamas only because he's seen more in public now, Near is dressed in a long, loose shirt with an almost as equally long cotton jacket with patches of corduroy. His hair falls to his waist - and he's clearly been trying to care for it himself.
As he greets Mello, one finger is already twirling in it.]
I never really got to see the damage properly.
[He tilts his head, red eyes looking over what he could glean of Mello's scars in the warehouse's dark interior. Back then he hadn't even turned to look at him. He hadn't wanted to react in any way.]
I like them. [He says of the scars.] They make you look dangerous.
no subject
[Of course: that's his initial reaction upon seeing a naga. Would N expect anything less?]
They really fucked you, yea?
[A rhetorical question. The heat burning in Mello's veins has been proof that he will eventually, too, be fucked. It's almost a joke, considering the proof behind his scars. He wants to take a step back against Near's initial approach. But he doesn't. Mello's never been one to back off.]
[His expression is neutral, even if his body is tense.]
Eli. [The name is foreign on his tongue.]
[And Oh, how he hates commentary on his scars. For Mello, they're a curse. Proof of momentary loss. Besides, he's always been so vain.]
I was backed into a corner, [He admits with a vapid tone.] I had no other choice. [Let it be known that Mello set the bomb off, himself. Let it be known that almost no one else was responsible for this.]
So you're always like this?
[Genuine curiosity.]
You've got no choice?
no subject
[The short hum and accompanying nod is his answer to basically all of Mello's questions.
Yes, this place has fucked him to some degree. Yes he's always like this and yes he had no say in the matter. Mello's overall response to his appearance doesn't bother him. He'd expected about as much.
He could say more about the scars, tell his rival that the fact that he'd lived through the explosion was impressive enough. He'd had his name revealed and had managed to get away without Kira learning it at the time. It had been a loss, yes. But it had also been the best way to lose in that scenario. This isn't credit he would give to just anyone.
But Mello clearly doesn't want to talk about that, so he says nothing more on the subject.]
You had other questions?
[He holds out one arm as he asks this, rolling up the sleeve. The scales cover the entire limb, and the gesture implies that the blond is free to touch them.]
Or did you merely want to see if I was real.
no subject
[He twitches a brow at the physical offering; what the hell is N thinking? Mello could view him as a monster, could attempt to cut him down for being a visage. But he, too, has something to prove, doesn't he?]
[They always have, in one way or another. So Mello will answer by drawing closer, tearing a glove off with his teeth before tucking it into his pocket. He doesn't reach out tentatively — he never would — and his mouth is a grim, straight line as he touches fingertips over the scales, the uneven things that were once Near's skin. He's no one to judge, though he would never let anyone feel over his scars.]
You always were a snake, [he comments. Half-teasing, half-dead serious. Eyes fixed on his rival's arm, he expects an attack at any moment. Because he's a paranoid thing. Because that's what he would do. And Mello is ready for it, if nothing else.]
I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you've bonded with Yagami for gain. [What else would it be? He trusts Near more than he trusts L.]
And that you haven't forgotten that he killed me. Would've killed you too if he could have.
[He doesn't pretend that Near cares at all about L's death. The thing before him made that clear from the moment they were informed by Roger. Cold thing that he's always been.]
[Tell me there's a method to this. Tell me you haven't become a complete fucking idiot in the span of a decade.]
[As ungloved fingers tentatively and curiously explore the rise and fall of scales, the texture, the temperature. He tells himself that Near deserved this. Tells himself that this is the epitome of just desserts.]
[But Mello doesn't believe it. Not really.]
[N deserved this as much as he deserved his own scars, in the end.]
no subject
He accepts the teasing without comment. Though he wouldn't consider himself snake-like in the way he handled things, he could see how Mello would. And there's a part of him that enjoys being ribbed by the only other person in Wammy's whose opinion mattered for anything.]
I have no love for Mr. Yagami. The bond is insurance, should he find out anything about me. And because I don't trust Linden to handle his connection to him appropriately.
[The feeling of Mello's hand on his arm lingers. It's so rare that anyone touches him in any meaningful way. The most physical contact he has with another living thing on a regular basis is the hyena dog he lays beside for its body heat. It's distracting, bringing back memories of his previous bond to this man.]
He can't kill either of us here in any lasting way. We would be brought back again and he would have shown his hand. He won't be that foolish.
[That doesn't mean he won't try something else. They have the upper hand for the moment, which is something they didn't have back in their own world. Light doesn't know their true connection to L - and in Near's case, how they're connected at all outside of the bond.]
The only upside being a monster grants me at the moment is the different perspective from the rest of you.
[And the ability to bond with all of them with no difficulties.]
no subject
[Besides, the monster is a fucking kid. Mello would know; he sat across from him and was amused by what he saw. Well-dressed and charismatic, but a kid, all the same.]
[Doesn't matter that they're only a few years apart. While Near — is so much older, though he seems to retain many of the same childish qualities, upon first impression.]
I know he's not stupid, [Mello near-snaps for some reason. Maybe it's because while Kira can't permanently kill them... it means the same in reverse. Mello could fucking behead the boy a thousand times and it would mean absolutely nothing. He'll never get his justice; he'll never truly receive satisfaction.]
But I also know how bonds work.
[Half-accusing, he shoves his hands into his coat pockets.]
[Or at least he's pretty sure he does. He eyes the other: ridiculously long hair, no-longer human. It's jarring, really. But Mello will adjust. He always has. It's an ability that's gotten him through life more than once.]
[And he's not accusing N of anything, per se, but — ]
He can get into your head, one way or another, yea? That's how he compromised Linden?
[Has to be. Mello refuses to believe that L just went along willingly.]
no subject
[Near frowns a bit now and slowly pulls the sleeve of his jacket back down over his arm. He hates that he misses the physical contact already but there are more important things to focus on.]
Linden never had a rival. Kira was the first to truly challenge him, and I think their intellectual battle became something of an obsession for him.
[L had approached Light in person, had shown him his face and even brought him into his operations. Near and Mello had never risked that. Kira hadn't seen Near's face until Near had been certain that he wouldn't be killed because of it. From the start, L had been taking unnecessary risks. It was a game to him, and the bigger the risks the better the payoff.
Except he'd lost in the end, hadn't he? And now that he has a chance to face his opponent again he can only continue with that same obsession from a different angle.]
I think Linden compromised himself. He opened his door and let Kira in because he wanted to.
[Aside from being very charismatic, Yagami Light doesn't actually have that much going for him personality-wise. He coerces people who want to have someone to follow. Near has never had that problem.]
Remember, I've seen the man writhing on the ground. He had little chance of getting into my head before, he has none now.
no subject
[Well, he failed.]
[Still, the explanation is too simple. There had to be something more there: something that M had never quite been able to figure out. He'd always considered that their predecessor had been a bit too confident in that particular case, even if the idea is nothing short of absurd.]
[L was L. Mello likes to think he was well-aware of his own abilities, but. What if he was wrong? What if L was wrong?]
[Of course he was. He lost, in the end. And it wasn't a sacrifice, no. The blond knows that because if he'd expected it, he would have chosen. Another thing he'd always wondered about: perhaps it was always meant to be the final test between himself and Near regarding who would fill his shoes but that — ]
[Well. Mello's always been something of a pompous optimist, even at his worst.]
[The same thoughts that have gone 'round and 'round since he took off from The House in the pouring rain, and now the thought of Kira literally writhing around on the ground at Near's mercy evokes a wicked grin. Bastard got what he deserved, didn't he? Even if Mello had to go up in flames for it to happen.]
It's been a long time.
[Still, he argues, gesturing towards his rival's appearance. It isn't that Near is a monster, though that might always be a jarring sight. Mello doesn't ever think he'll get used to it. It's the age, the fact that N appears older now that he even remembers L that one time they met when the cornsilk-haired boy was too young to gauge age properly at all.]
You can't blame me for questioning whether you've changed.
[Though Near's tone and way of speaking suggests this isn't the case, at all.] I don't know how long you've been here, and I don't know if the Bond has affected you negatively.
[Even if he is inclined to take the other's word for it. For now. Because he seems to speak the truth with something almost resembling a passive bitterness — he's always looked down on their 'mentor,' ever since the man lost what would then become their game.]
You called him weak.
[A lifetime ago. In no uncertain terms.] It remains to be seen. [Because Mello outright refuses to believe it until he bears witness to it, himself.] You realize that by effect, you're suggesting we'd spent our entire lives aspiring to emulate a man we had the ability to defeat.
[And Near sees no problem with this?]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)