001 | Video

[firewalled]

Name: Rich Goranski
Date: September 2
Format: Video

[The face that fills the screen is notable for a lot of reasons. For those who haven't met Rich, the harsh red scars covering his face, neck, and shoulders are certainly different. Scales are starting to pepper the skin like freckles, but it still doesn't do much to hide the damage. Nor does it distract from how emotional Rich looks. As much as he tries to keep his expression even, there's tension in his jaw, a slight furrow in his brow, and his eyes look slightly red.

He offers a weak smile and a wave to the camera, before taking a deep breath in and out. Apparently this is going to be difficult for him.]

Hey everyone. If you don't know me, I'm Rich Goranski. I got here last month, so... yeah. Anyways, I'm not here to break the ice or anything. I... need to tell everyone about some stuff, and I've been kind of meaning to do this for days and I just didn't know how. Anyways. I just wanted to warn you.

There's this guy you might have met. Looks like some handsome Japanese model, and he's got two different coloured eyes? I can send a picture if you don't know what I'm talking about. He's called the SQUIP. Or well, I don't know if that's what it calls itself here. It fucking introduced itself as Gregward to me, but... I think that's because we have a history. We're from the same place, and if what he did to me and my friends is any indication, he's probably going to really hurt someone here. He's already got his claws in some people and I just... don't want anyone else to go through that.

[He takes a moment to nibble on his lip and then look back at the camera, as if he's found some new source of bravery.]

Back home, the SQUIP -uh, Super Quantum Unit Intel... Processor- [He counts them off on his fingers as he attempts to remember the acronym.] It wasn't human. It was actually this pill sized supercomputer that you could take? It'd get up into your head and implant in your brain and then it was... basically supposed to help make you cooler. Or at least, that's what they said when I bought one. I got one back as a freshman and I... I mean, I guess it's kind of obvious that it fucked me up.

It doesn't really have any concerns about hurting people to get what it wants. It'd electrocute me if I didn't do or say the right thing. It put me on this really messed up work out plan and I built up way too much muscle way too quickly. I've got a bunch of stretch marks to prove it. And if you argued with it long enough, it wasn't afraid to just... take over your whole body. The last few months I had the thing, I wasn't even ever myself anymore... I just had to watch myself do all this shit that I'd never, ever want to do. Like selling them to other kids.

And it could get in your head. It would take away senses or give you weird hallucinations to make sure you didn't think about resisting. A friend of mine... Jeremy, he actually had his best friend erased from his vision so he couldn't even see him? I think he called it optic nerve blocking.

It finds other ways to manipulate you too. It's really charming at first, and it knows how to find and pick at every little insecurity you have. It'll use anything. Any memory, any good thought... I uh. When it wanted me to listen, it would take on the appearance of my mom. I hadn't seen her since I was little and I didn't want to lose that again. Even if she was saying things she'd never say... I couldn't make her hurt again.

[His voice cracks on the last few words, and he tries to cover it up by clearing his throat, taking a deep breath again.]

Anyways, its main goal wasn't actually to help us, if that wasn't obvious. It made me stock up on a bunch of the pills to try to slip them into everyone's drinks. It got Jeremy on board when I... uh, ducked out, to put it nicely.

It just wanted to spread to as many people as possible. It was trying to make this like, hivemind sort of thing. Called it a social network. Where no one had to hurt anymore. But it... it fucked with people until they don't know who they are anymore. Jeremy's SQUIP - I think that's the one that's here right now - it synced with me, and it made me go from being annoyed by Jeremy to just completely being his best friend. I couldn't think anything negative about him. And it did the same to a bunch of other people. It erased everything about them... practically made them zombies. I'm lucky there was someone who knew how to get rid of them. I... eventually tried burning mine out, but it didn't go as planned.

Anyways, the important thing is that the SQUIP is dangerous. There isn't a single person in my world who had a good experience with one, and even if it can't implant in people's brains now, it's still trying to hurt them. There's this guy he's hanging around with that he must have adopted as some new fucking project. And in that weird dream world, with that whole... monsters being slaves thing? It bought me. Me and one of my friends here, Connor. It tried to act like it wasn't going to do anything but it kept giving me orders and tried to get me to hide the truth from Connor. And then I don't know what it did to him... I think it must have cast some spell on him or something to make him agree more. It's a manipulative, abusive asshole. And I don't want it getting to anyone here... so that's why I had to tell everyone all this.

[He tries for a smile again, but it's too forced. He can feel a lump in his throat that signals to him he'd better end this fast.]

Anyways, that's about all I've gotta say. If you have any questions, let me know. I've got the receipts, I guess you'd call it. That's what they call 'em when you call someone out, right? Whatever. Thanks for listening. Hopefully next time I won't be such a fucking downer.

And uh, if there're any witches who're listening and know spells to like... conjure up something? Let me know. I might need a little favour.

[Rich gives a salute and ends the recording. His responses may be slow, but he just needs a minute to breathe normally again.]

Comments

[faithlikeaseed]

Maker's breath, tell me about it--his arm felt like he was all bone last we met. [Suddenly concerned,] Was he like that before he Bonded it, d'you know?

[Probably, he's guessing; physical neglect that profound was usually a habit of a lifetime--but you never knew with demons.]

[firewalled]

No idea, actually. I wouldn't exactly be surprised. I told you about the muscle gain I got. I think Jeremy had similiar marks, and that was only after a couple months.

[That said, Rich doesn't really know the signs as well as Myr does.]

[faithlikeaseed]

You did. Not as much of a tell as sprouting horns or claws, but that's something to go on.

[So rather than Linden's current frailty being the demon's fault, any positive change in it would be.

...Myr wonders to himself if that single thing by itself would be so terrible. Given the creature's apparent drive to push its hosts to an excess of ill health in the other direction--

Probably.]

Right. Well. We already know he's taken in. What's left to us is either to pry him from it or stop it before it can ruin him, too.

[firewalled]

It's something, anyways. I don't know if it's all from the SQUIP, but it's not impossible to say that it made it worse.

[Whether through starving L more or making L so overworked he doesn't have time to eat. Rich doesn't really know.]

We have to try to get him out of it if we can. It's... it'd be a lot easier if I knew what exactly he thought it was doing for him that he couldn't do on his own.

[faithlikeaseed]

Even did we know, it might not change a thing, [gently said.] I don't know about your variety but our demons promise what would be impossible by other means.Whatever it is--he's sharp enough he's likely exhausted his other options to get it.

Or has convinced himself he has.

[firewalled]

It helped with Jeremy, though. Sometimes, knowing what they're so desperate for helps get through to them. You can relate more. And... I don't know, I think he's probably lonely if he was desperate enough to listen to it. Having someone... try to see things from his perspective might help. I don't know.

[He sighs.]

Maybe that's too much to ask for when he's such an asshole.

[faithlikeaseed]

True--there's no reason to give in to despair on this before we've even begun. And I think you might be right there--that he's lonely. [Working strictly from his own moment of delighted recognition of an opponent, oh, he thinks so.]

It's all right not to know here, Rich. And all right to leave saving him to others who haven't been wounded by the thing he's Bonded to. No sense in becoming a casualty again trying.

Besides, [dimly amused,] I've plenty of experience in dealing kindly with assholes. I'll find a way to get through to him.

[firewalled]

Yeah... we have to try, okay? I know I don't know much, but... I'm stubborn, okay? I'm not going to give up and leave people to just deal with my mess.

[Honestly, he sounds slightly offended that Myr seems to think he should handle this alone.]

I have experience being the asshole, Myr. I'm not going to let another person become a victim.

[faithlikeaseed]

[Oh, brave heart.

Would Myr take his own advice gracefully if he were in Rich's situation? Probably not, and it endears him to the younger man knowing that.]

All right--that did come off a little like I was trying to shove you out of helping for your own good, didn't it? [He'll cop to it.]

Which isn't my intent--you're the one with first-hand experience and a personal reason to hate the thing; it's your fight as much as anyone's.

Just don't break your own heart on someone who may've already gone beyond convincing. [That's Myr's job, the hypocrite.]

[firewalled]

Just a little... It's okay. I know you're just trying to help.

[And he is a kid, compared to a lot of people here, and most likely, to Myr. He wouldn't be surprised if he was considered too young or too weak for a fight. Even if he most definitely is not.]

I'm not going to break my heart over him. He's not worth that much.

[Besides, the situation's done enough t stomp on Rich's heart already.]

[faithlikeaseed]

[It's not so much Rich's age, in Myr's estimation, that's a reason to keep him out of the fight--the Hero of Ferelden hadn't been much older, after all, at the time of the Fifth Blight. You grew up fast on Thedas.

He's just got a healthy appreciation for how debilitating the unseen sort of wounds can be for everyone but, well, himself.

Maybe he'll work that one out in time.]

Fair enough. [A perverse part of him wants to argue worth--all men are equal in the Maker's sight, etcetera--but this is really not the time.] I'll trust you know your limits.

But I will throw both your watches out the window if that happens again, [and that's very obviously teasing.]

[firewalled]

[Rich rolls his eyes at Myr's teasing comment, scoffing gently.]

You know he's the one who started it. And the one who wouldn't let it go without getting the last word.

[Which is honestly super childish. Isn't Linden at least a few years older than him?]

[faithlikeaseed]

As your mother, [s a r c a s m,] I'm obliged to remind you it takes two to carry a fight.

But I'll get rid of his first.

[It is startlingly childish. Which really has Myr all the more interested in exactly what in the Void is going on with Linden.]

[firewalled]

As your son, am I really carrying a fight if I'm just spouting gibberish that he feels like he needs to respond to?

[His chaotic energy is good for something, it seems, and that's pissing Linden off.]

[faithlikeaseed]

I don't know--is your next trick hovering your hands over him yelling you're not touching him when he fusses about it?

[Kids.]

[firewalled]

... Now I almost kind of want to know how badly he'd react if I pulled that with him.

Not that I'm going to, before you nag me.

[faithlikeaseed]

Then I've succeeded as your mother, knowing my nagging voice will follow you to your grave and keep you from doing anything untoward. [There's a grin in his voice.]

I'm hereby retiring from parenthood. Go forth, child, and do me proud. [That's how it works, right.]

[firewalled]

I don't think that's how it works. Once you decide to adopt, you're stuck with the little gremlin basically forever.

So that means you're stuck with me, mom.

[faithlikeaseed]

Damn. [He doesn't sound at all put out.] Then instead of retirement I s'pose I'll settle for being a suitably proud mother and periodically embarrassing you in front of your friends.

[You're the one stuck with him.]

[firewalled]

God, disgusting. You don't even know enough to embarrass me with.

[Those are some famous last words.

And yes, according to Rich Goranski, being proud of him and his accomplishments is disgusting.]

[faithlikeaseed]

I'll start with my maternal pride, if nothing else, since that's already so odious.

[It's teasing still, but there's also a note of--worry? Sadness?--in there. How deep do the wounds go, Rich?]

[firewalled]

It is, trust me. I can get by without the cooing over me, dude.

[Rich is quite fine without the pride. No one's ever thought he did anything good, so they certainly don't need to start now.]

[faithlikeaseed]

[Too late, it's already happened.

Myr snorts.]

Luckily for you cooing's a bridge too far; I'd never look at myself in the mirror again.

[Not that he could any longer anyway, but y'know.

Still, he can take a hint.] And on that note I'd best let you go. But mark what I said about brabery earlier, hm?

[firewalled]

I'll keep it in mind. Thanks for listening to all of this... and trying to help. Give me a call if there's any chance I can return the favour, okay?

I'll see you around.

[faithlikeaseed]

I'll be sure to. Take care of yourself, Rich.

[And Maker walk with you, of course.]