eyeforaneye: (091;)
Uchiha Sasuke ([personal profile] eyeforaneye) wrote in [community profile] aefenglom2020-07-09 06:02 pm

text; un: sasukeuchiha

Name: Sasuke Uchiha
Date: 07/09
Format: Text/Video

[ The video opens with a perfectly still, immaculately framed sepia shot of a storefront. The glass of the windows is smudged with dirt and dust that’s far less noticeable at the center but which appears borderline opaque around the outside edges, and with a flecked paint job on the wood siding it’s clear that this particular store isn’t wearing its age well.

Nevertheless the signage above the store appears newly updated, stark and clean in sharp contrast to the rest.
]

This is an advertisement for Daemonologie. [ There’s a pause as if even he doesn’t know how to quite handle the appearance of the business he somehow has to make appealing, at least managing to hold in a sigh. ] I’m fixing it.

Check the attached text in accordance with this video. [ Which is how the clip itself abruptly ends, though not before Sasuke turns the camera to the left and then to the right to make the shop’s location in the southwestern Shopping District more apparent to any who might be on the lookout. ]

The following is a statement prepared by my employer:

Daemonologie is an all-ages magical menagerie and emporium servicing both witches and monsters. Are you tired of sourcing your mystical beasts from the Wildes? Are you feeling overwhelmed trying to find the right breeder for your ideal familiar? Do you need the feather of an enchanted sparrow for your latest potion but don’t feel like buying the whole bird?

Then Daemonologie is the place for you. We not only provide quality companionship in the form of magical creatures aplenty but we also offer a variety of animal byproducts for any of your witching needs. Quills? Not a problem. Unfertilized and fertilized eggs? We have them. Scales both decorative and deadly? You know the answer! Stop on by today!

(Note: Vampires welcome! Ask about our animal blood specials (guaranteed to be high in magic)! Also don’t miss our weekly sale items: enchanted brushes for even the thickest fur, pewter cauldrons, and a humidifying enchantment to offer comfort and relief from a dry molt.)

As a bonus we’re offering a special promotion. Comment here if you would like to take a short quiz that will pair you with the familiar best suited to your personality type. You will then receive a 5% discount on the animal that you receive as your result. What a deal!

For the first question: what is your ideal vacation spot?

A. The city
B. The beach
C. Somewhere woodsy
D. The mountains
E. The desert


[ He did not expect for his second day on the job to require him to market his workplace to other Mirrorbound, but here he is. ]
marmoron: prescar (Look bub)

un: keith

[personal profile] marmoron 2020-07-09 09:27 pm (UTC)(link)
why is 'outer space' not an option
stopfen: (The red and bloody land)

[personal profile] stopfen 2020-07-09 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[Sasuke...Sasuke did you write up a thing they wanted him to say instead of saying. That's so much more effort.]

What do monsters get? They don't need familiars.
slushfund: just wondering how (pic#14136451)

text, un: hiruma.

[personal profile] slushfund 2020-07-09 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Does it look like a shit-hole on the inside, too?
coherer: halfway up the street (pic#13782868)

text, un: jonas.

[personal profile] coherer 2020-07-09 09:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, ppl are really missing the point of this post.

C, definitely somewhere woodsy. I hope Eddie won't be too mad I'm cheating on him like this, but I am prepared to risk that for any and all hilarious quizzes.
scowlish: (neutral)

text; @onni

[personal profile] scowlish 2020-07-09 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[Well, this sounds ridiculous. But a resource for things related to magic might be useful.]

I don't go on vacations. But the best option would be C.
Edited 2020-07-09 21:36 (UTC)
slushfund: we should fold (pic#14135624)

[personal profile] slushfund 2020-07-09 09:38 pm (UTC)(link)
You're terrible at marketing.

This is why you're merely a lackey and not the owner of the establishment, who seems just as equally bad but more inclined to cover that up with enthusiasm.
marmoron: marmoron (you have cat breath)

[personal profile] marmoron 2020-07-09 09:39 pm (UTC)(link)
that's for you to figure out isn't it
coherer: downtown hotspot (pic#13901477)

[personal profile] coherer 2020-07-09 09:40 pm (UTC)(link)
I sure do.

(LOL)
sylphid: <user name="roseburst"> (hard to tell)

text; un: sylphid

[personal profile] sylphid 2020-07-09 09:40 pm (UTC)(link)
d the mountains

[She doesn't need a pet but she's curious about the outcome.]
usurpers: (pic#14002496)

un: jaeger

[personal profile] usurpers 2020-07-09 09:45 pm (UTC)(link)
[ he is really hungry with all this heat so— ]

E.

How sharp are the quills?
rightfoot: (pic#13223112)

text | un: reddeer

[personal profile] rightfoot 2020-07-09 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
How are said animals obtained, then? Are they treated ethically? Are they willing blood donors?

[ He's only like 50% messing with Sasuke... ]

Also, A.

sylphid: <user name="roseburst"> (feelin like elliot)

[personal profile] sylphid 2020-07-09 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
my aesthetic?
slushfund: everybody else said: (pic#14100791)

[personal profile] slushfund 2020-07-09 09:49 pm (UTC)(link)
You're so right, you got me there. I'm raising both of my healthy hands in surrender.

What are your animal blood specials? I was told to ask by your vastly superior coworker.
fiddlestick: (bye felicia)

un: elliot

[personal profile] fiddlestick 2020-07-09 09:50 pm (UTC)(link)
d, the mountains!

I mean, assuming it's at a resort and not the kind of vacation where you hike.

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