un: anonymous;

[thisisamazing]

Name: "anonymous" (Hiccup Haddock III)
Date: Feb. 2
Format: Text

some things recently came up and it has me thinking a lot. i'm not sure who else to ask this? the person i'd normally talk to is... part of it.

is it possible to have romantic feelings for more than one person at the same time? does that make you a bad person? i never had to consider it before because i thought everything would be simple, for me at least, but now it isn't so simple and i'm not

sure what to do

i don't want to hurt them

[ooc: Hiccup is posting anonymously but as this function isn't always reliable, let me know if you want him to anonfail! He's having some relationship troubles whoops.]

Comments

[definingfuture]

[Tony's return expression twists into something equally wry. Yup, totally from experience there.]

I didn't really know at the time. And even if I had, I mean, you like who you like, you know? We can't always control that. Sometimes we end up liking people and the situation isn't perfect, but we can't just stop liking them.

[Tony is the type that just works through his thoughts out loud, but he does generally have a solid grasp on his beliefs.]

Anyway, that isn't the point I'm trying to make. I'm saying that even though things are complicated, it doesn't make you a bad person. It's just... life is more complicated than that. I used to think--I used to dream of getting married. I thought I'd just meet that one person, fall in love, and that would be it. Bam. Just like that. But then I fell in love and it wasn't that easy. And I fell in love again. And- well, things get weird. There's no way around it. But that isn't your fault.

[thisisamazing]

'Wanting to kill you' is- is kind of a little more serious than an imperfect situation. [But it sounds like Tony's lived a much more interesting life than Hiccup has, at least as far as relationships go. He feels inexperienced in comparison.]

I- I did too, you know. I figured that'd be my life. Fall in love, marry her eventually, and that's that. I never really planned to have those feelings for anyone else. [He leans back in his chair a little, frowning.] I never planned to spend months in another world learning how to use magic, though, either.

I just wish I knew what to do.

[definingfuture]

Okay, that's fair. [Tony's world is one of extremes. Liking an enemy is probably not the best example and he has to remember that. He tilts his head up to the ceiling.]

You just don't always have that ideal storybook romance. You have to make it happen.

[Maybe he needs to switch metaphors.]

Okay, so, different story. When I was first starting out my career--my newer one--I had already been working the family business for years. It was what I knew. I was good at it. And, frankly, I did enjoy it. But then I found something else, making something else, and I thought this is it. I love this. I need this.

And it wasn't easy. I tried to quit my first job; tried to quit the second, because I always felt like I was cheating on one or the other. I had people depending on me in both situations and it was demanding.

[He looks at Hiccup seriously, which is almost funny with Tony. And even with that sincere look, he still has a half-grin.]

But I couldn't quit either. I love them. And it's messy and sometimes it gets weird. So I take it one day at a time. If you get the chance, talk it out. I know it's not a clean blueprint, but sometimes you have to make stuff up as you go along and tweak it when it crashes. We aren't perfect. Sometimes we don't know what to do.

[thisisamazing]

It's a little different- jobs, versus... versus, people. Partners. But- [He blows out a breath, finger drawing idle patterns on the table.] But you're saying, they both had a place in your life? One couldn't replace the other. [That definitely sounds familiar right there. It isn't that Newt is a replacement for Astrid meant to fill the hole in his chest that misses her. That hole will never be filled until he goes back home. Newt... he fills a different hole, slots into Hiccup's heart like he belongs there.

He offers a tentative smile, really taking in what he has to say. It's reassuring, that he doesn't have to have all the answers. That no one would.] Yeah? So... I talk to him, because that's all I can do right now, and see where things go?

[definingfuture]

[Tony gives Hiccup a wry little half-smile that looks playfully doubtful when the viking tells him that commitments to jobs and people aren't the same thing. You've never dated Iron Man is right on his lips, waiting to come out, but he manages not to make that remark. It would involve far more complicated explanations that really won't help Hiccup right now.]

What I'm saying is that just because you like one new thing--person or otherwise--doesn't mean you stop liking everything you had before you met them. And, yeah, you're right, not every situation is going to be the same.

[And life has only ever gotten more complicated in his experience.]

But talking is the first step, right? At least you two can work on it together.

[thisisamazing]

I mean, I- I know that, none of this has changed how I feel about Astrid in any way, but... [He breathes out, frowning down into his milkshake, which is idly melting in the glass.] You- Do you think he'll see how much I care about him, too? Even despite that? [Maybe that's what he's afraid of. That Newt won't want to be with him if he's not the only one in Hiccup's heart.

Not that he'd blame him for that. He deserves someone who will give him everything.] I'm just scared it won't fix things. I- I don't want things to be the way they are now for the rest of our time here. He's been avoiding me since that first conversation, and we've barely spoken, and I can't just- can't keep going on like this. Neither of us can.

Maybe that person was right. I am a coward. I should just- just talk to him.