[ text; backdated to about the 18th ]

[loadme]

Name: Monika
Date: Octeuril 18
Format: Text

Isn't it funny how you can spend weeks, months, and maybe even longer in trying to be a better person.

Only for a couple of bad days to make it feel like you lost most of your progress?

Comments

text | un: reddeer

[rightfoot]

Sounds familiar.

[loadme]

You think so?

[hoboagogo]

[ Mood. ]

you talking about that full moon shit or something else

[loadme]

I was more referring to a few days ago, where witches became monsters. And monsters grew new and different parts.

Text un: redkey

[princessascended]

I think you're a good person, Monika.

[Not exactly the most deep response, but she doesn't have much to go with yet, and she hasn't known her all that long.]

Re: Text un: redkey

[loadme]

You're sweet, but also kind of biased.

text

[curruid_coinchenn]

[ Berserker ... doesn't really remember what happened or what he encouraged Monika to do during the moons, just that he did encounter her. ]

are you going to just dwell on it or work to undo the damage you've done to your progress?

[loadme]

You make it sound so easy!

text; un: kiva

[kivatteru]

That happened to me. I will not disclose the details, but a certain event in the past made me take a very hasty and terrible decision.

[loadme]

I think I know where you're coming from. Before I made it here, I was pretty terrible and mean to everyone around me!

That's why I'm trying so hard to be better.

Private; text

[showsnopiety]

Do you wonder sometimes if it's worth being that so called 'better person'?

Are you even doing it for you?

It may not even be worth it.

Maybe you should be what comes naturally to you instead.

...that's a feeling I'm familiar with.

Private; text

[loadme]

I'm not interested in being my old self again.

And if that's what you're encouraging, you should probably stop now.

[usurpers]

A better person for who?

[loadme]

For myself.

And for all the friends I've made here.

un: enkidu

[enkidoh]

I believe no one has been the person they used to be the last few days.

I think it is important not to dwell over such things. Unless you want to stop growing, that is.

[loadme]

I just can't help but to think about it, you know?

It made some pretty rough memories come back and it's tough not to let it get to me.

text (un: ALPHYS)

[textsfromhotland]

i don't even wanna think about backsliding tbh

[She's only at the start of her redemption arc, after all!]

[loadme]

What helps me is thinking about my friends.

I want to be better for them.

Text a few days late

[ishisstrength]

Are you okay?

[loadme]

Not really! But I don't have any choice than to deal with it.

text, un: CoolSkeleton95

[spaghettimonster]

TRYING TO BE A BETTER PERSON...

IF IT WERE EASY FOR EVERYONE, THEY WOULDN'T TALK SO HIGHLY ABOUT THOSE WHO ACHIEVE IT!!

TAKE IT FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS. I'VE SEEN LOADS OF PEOPLE TRY AND FAIL TO BE AS GREAT AS ME!

BUT THE HARDEST PART ISN'T TRYING AND SUCCEEDING FOREVER. IT'S STARTING AGAIN AFTER A SETBACK.

[loadme]

It's even scarier when you think about how this won't be my last setback.

It's impossible to think that it won't be.

text

[onlyangelshavewings]

you werent yourself honey, dont beat yourself up for what happened ok?

[loadme]

How's your arm? Is it better?

I'm so sorry.

voice; private;

[beariot]

[ After several moments and watching quite a few of the conversations unfold, Ursula finally contacted Monika outright, her tone soft, familiar. ]

Do you feel like you've come to an answer?

[loadme]

I guess all I can really do is keep going forward.

I just wish I could apologize to everyone I hurt.